For a long time I have been troubled by the statistics that are thrown around in relation to the divorce rate of couples who have a child with autism. 75%, 80% and then last week I heard 93%.
Seriously, 93% was the final straw when I decided I need to seek out these statistics and actually find some empirical evidence to back up what people are throwing around because if 93% is the actual number I want to get that number out there. Not to say if your child is diagnosed with autism only 7 out of every 100 marriages are going to survive. But to say we have to change this. We have to find a way so couples can still be couples. A way to lower them numbers.
The pilot boy and I are the best of friends. I mean that sincerely. He is a kind, caring and compassionate man that would do anything for this family. He just doesn’t get autism. He doesn’t get that T4′s milk HAS to be at a certain level and heated for 31 seconds. He doesn’t get that if he touches something that he isn’t meant to I have to clean it all again because he has put ‘germs’ on it.
He doesn’t get that sometimes I can’t be everything for THREE children who all have autism and be there for him also. Something had to give and it was our marriage that was the price that was paid.
Having said that I see hope. He is still in our life. He is trying so very hard to be supportive and to get autism. And he is. But often I find myself saying to him, ‘What hope did we have, if the divorce rate is this high with one autistic child than what hope in hell have we got with three autistic children’.
I wonder how many other people living with autism that may also be going through a rough patch look at 93% being thrown around and also wonder, ‘What hope do they have?’
But one thing I want people to understand is that marriage, relationships and people’s emotions are not numbers and shouldn’t be based on statistics. We are all individuals, our children are all individuals and your situation is just that, your situation.
I am going to make this report a detailed informative piece filled with empirical evidence and stated sources so you then have the information you need to put these figures to rest (Or not) but so you can than have the resources you need to follow this information up if you choose too.
So whilst I am researching this topic for us all I would like to ask what you think about this subject, what are your opinions;
What do you think will be the difference when we compare the statistics of a standard divorce in Australia to divorce where families are living with autism – Do you think there will be much difference in the numbers?
What have you heard about the statistics of families living with autism and the breakdown of the matrimonial relationship?
What do you personally think about this subject?
Either comment below or if you would like to discuss your opinion personally please do so at admin@mumtalksautism.com I really hope you will share your opinion with me about this subject.
I’m linking up with Jess over at Essentially Jess for IBOT. (I Blog on Tuesdays)
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{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
Oh I never realised it was that high! It’s terrible!
I wonder what can be done to give families the marriage support they need? I’m assuming its harder to do all sorts of things like get baby sitters, and have nights out.
I’m not sure if they are this high Jess I am researching it at the moment. Get some empirical evidence to back up the statistics that are being thrown around.
We are hoping to break soil on a respite retreat for families by the end of the year so they can get this much needed break as a family and as a couple.
I am hoping we can make a small amount of difference for families.
Thanks for reading Jess and commenting as always.
Much Love MTA.
We have seen a few of the situations that ‘expediate’ a divorce, it takes a lot to work through life, and I guess if you get through these things your relationship gets some sort of firm footing.
Declutterbug recently posted..And the children were helping
Absolutely. I think it will either make you or break you. Will be interesting to see what the results come back in relation to if they are much different to standard divorce numbers where there is no special needs child involved.
Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment it is really appreciated.
MTA.